John 20 "From Doubt to Faith: The Journey of Belief"

Everything we do in life prepares us for the next thing we have to do, our next adventure. Nobody starts finished, we have to get there step by step. Like, when we’re born, all we can do is lay there and complain but all that screaming and squirming builds the foundational strength in our muscles and coordination so we can start crawling—because we gotta get moving, got places to go. Crawling builds balance and motor skills, pretty soon we graduate to walking and then running—so much more mobility and confidence. Now it’s our parents who are complaining, “Slow down. Walk!” But no! Running isn’t fast enough, so we learn how to ride a bike, which eventually makes us want the independence of driving a car. And of course, driving a car naturally leads to the universal joy of driving to Walmart in sweatpants and Crocs so we can complain about self-checkout and the rising price of cheese. Oh, how far we’ve come!

Nobody starts finished. God is constantly leading us into situations that will shape us into the people He wants us to be—so we can do the things He wants us to do. Of course, some of us are slower learners than others. Some of us keep refusing to learn from our adventures, so He has to keep repeating the lesson louder and with a little more stink on it until He finally gets through to us. 

All those frustrations in our lives. Those are the lessons—opportunities to either put God’s wisdom to work, or fall back into our foolish ruts. God is always preparing us for our next adventure.

I think a perfect example of this is the way the Easter story happens in the Gospels. 

The women were the first to see the empty tomb and the only ones to see the angels—they knew Jesus was alive—but no one believed them. God did that on purpose. He chose them to be first BECAUSE no one would believe them. Why? Because in that culture, they were the weakest witnesses. So, the men were going to hear about the most important and glorious thing that ever happened from them and dismiss it as pure nonsense. Just the way God planned.

Then the women saw Jesus in person on the road—so their faith was as solid as it could possibly be. But the men still didn’t believe them. That had to be frustrating.

Stupid men. So, sure of their doubt and skepticism. This was a lesson for the women but it was also a lesson for the men.

Because those same men, who were so slow to believe, were going to need to remember what it felt like to hear the Gospel, hear about the resurrection—and not believe a word of it—completely dismiss it. Because they were going to spend the rest of their lives having exactly the same experience as those women—telling people Jesus is alive and it seems like the words just bounce off their chests and fall into the void. This was an important lesson.

And then when Jesus appears to the disciples in the house — even though the women had told them He was alive, even though Peter had already seen Him—they still thought He was a ghost and didn’t believe. Not until He proved to them it was Him.

They were going to need to remember what that was like when they started telling everyone else about the crucified Son of God being alive again. Remember how hard it was for them to believe. Even when He was standing in the room right in front of them. 

Today we’re going to focus on the one disciple who wasn't there when Jesus showed up in that room on Easter. By evening, most of the followers of Jesus had seen Him for themselves and were completely convinced of the resurrection. All but one guy…

John 20

Now Thomas, one of the twelve, called the Twin, was not with them when Jesus came. So the other disciples told him, “We have seen the Lord.” But he said to them, “Unless I see in his hands the mark of the nails, and place my finger into the mark of the nails, and place my hand into his side, I will never believe.” John 20:24-25

They’re all ganging up on Thomas but he ain’t having it. Let’s keep in mind that everyone telling ‘ol Doubting Thomas that Jesus was alive and they had seen Him—they didn’t believe at first either. Not one of them. But okay, Thomas is the one who gets the shameful nickname of Mr Doubt until the end of time. 

He was probably the bravest of all of them. When Jesus said they were going to go to Bethany because Lazarus had died, Thomas was the one who said, “Sure. Let’s do it. We might as well die, too.” I like Thomas. He’s a bit of a cynic.

They’re all in his face trying to convince him that Jesus has come back from the dead! They saw Him with their own two eyes! But the more they push, the more obstinate he gets in his unbelief. Probably a lesson to be learned there. 

Eventually Thomas is like, “I will never believe your ludicrous story unless I see the nail marks in His hands, stick my finger in the holes, and jam my entire hand inside the gash where the spear stabbed Him in the heart!” Unbelief can be crude. He probably thinks he’s being logical but he’s not. These are his friends. He knows they wouldn’t lie to him. He knows he should trust them. Instead, he’s holding on to his skeptical unbelief with all the blind doubt of a fanatic. His unbelief was irrational in the face of so many reliable witnesses. He refuses to believe. “I don’t know what kind of group hallucination you simple minded idiots think you saw—but I live in the real world. Jesus is dead. I saw it. The end. Leave me alone!”

But I’ll bet they didn’t leave him alone. I’ll bet they kept trying to convince him. I’ll bet it was an painful subject. Do you have anyone in your life that the Jesus conversation is a one way ticket to awkward? This went on for an entire week… 

Eight days later, his disciples were inside again, and Thomas was with them. Although the doors were locked, Jesus came and stood among them and said, “Peace be with you.” John 20:26

It’s a week later. Sunday again. Doors are still locked—interesting detail, they’re still afraid of the Jewish leaders. Jesus suddenly pops into the room just like He did the week before. Shalom, peeps! “Peace!” Same greeting as last time—this time the peace is directed specifically to the stubborn holdout who had been arguing with everyone. How do you think Thomas is feeling right about now?

Then he said to Thomas, “Put your finger here, and see my hands; and put out your hand, and place it in my side. Do not disbelieve, but believe.” Thomas answered him, “My Lord and my God!” John 20:27-28

Jesus is like, “Hey, Thomas, I heard what you said. You want some proof? Come on! Let’s make it weird—takes off His shirt to show the spear gash—go ahead, get your hand in there, knucklehead.” 

If I’m Thomas, I don’t have any need or desire to actually touch His wounds. Would you? It doesn’t say anything about him actually doing it. Some people think he did just because Jesus told him to but I don’t think so. In verse 29 Jesus is going to say Thomas believed because He saw with his eyes—not because he touched Him. Anyway, Jesus says something I find much more interesting. He says, “Do not disbelieve, but believe.” “Stop doubting. Stop holding on to your unbelief. Stop acting like an unbeliever.” Jesus tells him to believe!

Anyone else need to hear that? Is there anyone listening to me right now just holding onto your unbelief for some reason? I don’t know why. Could be a lot of reasons. Some Christian or some preacher hurt your feelings—or did something worse to you—so you don’t want to believe. Maybe mom or dad were too harsh and pushed Christianity and the church on you too hard. Shamed you for sin, tried to control you with Jesus. You’re like, “If that’s all there is to it, no thanks!” Maybe you’ve been collecting little doubts, holding on to things people have said over the years that make God and faith seem unreasonable, unlikely, old fashioned, so you just keep those unbeliefs in the corner of your mind—bring them out every time someone talks about Jesus and you might be tempted to embrace faith.

Jesus has a message for you. It’s been passed from person to person and was entrusted to me to give the message to you—they went to a lot of trouble to make sure it got to you. Here it is: Stop disbelieving, and believe. Lay down your cynicism. Set aside your skepticism. Those things are not going to give you any peace. They can’t save you. Your doubts are lying to you. You’re not doing yourself any favors by ignoring God and not trusting the Gospel.

That’s what Thomas finally realized. He had been arguing with his friends and insisting on unbelief for no good reason.

That was going to be important for him to remember when he started telling people about the resurrection and the hope of the Gospel—all those belligerent people who would refuse to believe him. And it was also good for the rest of the disciples to experience what it would be like when a close friend, someone who should trust them—when they refuse to believe—at least for a while. Be patient. Be bold. Be gentle but don’t give up.

Because when Thomas finally did believe, he really went for it.

Of all the disciples who saw Jesus for who He is and believed in the resurrection—Thomas has the best response. He has the most powerful reaction. He worships Him saying, “My Lord and my God!” That’s so good!

John closes his Gospel with a mirror of how he opened it. Chapter one, verse one: “In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God.” Then after all is said and done, the last disciple comes to true faith and worships Jesus, “My Lord and my God!”

And Jesus accepts his worship because Jesus is God. 

Jesus said to him, “Have you believed because you have seen me? Blessed are those who have not seen and yet have believed.” John 20:29

This is the final lesson of all these Easter appearances—this is the point. They all finally believed because of all the physical evidence: Jesus teleported in front of them, showed them His scars, ate with them, spoke with them—they saw Him in person. It was still hard for some of them to believe. This is the lesson: They were going to have to be patient with people. They were going to need to remember what it was like to know for sure and still have their friends think they were crazy. They were going to need to remember what it felt like to be in their shoes—skeptical, not believing a word of it, and then have Jesus show up and turn the lights on. Because when they went out into the world with this message, it was going to be hard for people to believe. Just like it was hard for them to believe.

And from now on, people were going to have to believe without the kind of physical proof they were given. Which Jesus says is better. 

Blessed are those who have not seen and yet have believed. 

Like all of us. Jesus says It’s better this way. He says we’re all blessed because we believe without seeing—purely by faith. For two thousand years people have been saying, “It’s not seeing that makes me believe, it’s believing that makes me see!”

Now Jesus did many other signs in the presence of the disciples, which are not written in this book; but these are written so that you may believe that Jesus is the Christ, the Son of God, and that by believing you may have life in his name. John 20:30-31

This is why the Gospel of John, and the other Gospels, were written. It’s why God made sure we have them. It’s why we read them and teach them: So we can believe that Jesus is the Messiah, the Christ, the Son of God—and believing in Him, we can have eternal life in His name.

And that’s the actual end of the Gospel of John—and the end of the four Gospels. There’s another chapter, like an epilogue. It’s like a scene that happens after the credits where Nick Fury shows up and tries to recruit Jesus for the Avengers while they eat shawarma. Except instead, Jesus makes breakfast and tells Peter how he’s going to die. Then he reiterates that last verse again, “Jesus did many other things as well. If every one of them were written down, I suppose that even the whole world would not have room for the books that would be written.”

I love that he told us there were many other amazing stories that didn’t get written down. But how can anything about Jesus not make the cut? Do you think John was like, “Hey, Lazarus, should I include that time when Mary dropped Martha’s favorite clay pot and Jesus put it back together using spit and Matthew’s solid gold wine cup?” Or, “Hey, Peter, what do you think about me including a whole chapter of the funniest times you said, ‘No, Lord.’ You big ‘ol oxymoron.” I’ll bet there were some crazy stories. Sometimes people pick up the Bible and are like, “This thing is thick.” But it could have been a lot thicker. I wish it was. I wish we had more Jesus stories but then again… some of us haven’t even read what we’ve got, right? Here’s your weekly reminder about freakin’ and Bibles. God must have thought what He gave us is enough to get the job done. Enough to give us faith so we can be saved and pass our faith on to other people. 

Do you remember when someone first shared the Gospel with you? How hard was it for you to believe them? Did you believe them? How long did it take to kick in?

It was a long time for me. My family didn’t go to church but once in a while I would stay at my friend’s house and their grandma would take me to church. Nothing stuck that I remember. Another time, when I was six or seven, a lady had a tiny little VBS (Vacation Bible School) in her living room and invited all the neighborhood kids to show up. It was free baby sitting so all our moms made us go. I remember cookies, cherry Kool-aid, a flannel board with shepherds and sheep on it—but I also remember her having us repeat a prayer. Something like, “Jesus, forgive me of my sin, come into my life and save me.”

I think I might have been a believer for five minutes after that. Until the neighborhood mean girls made fun of me for not being a Christian like them—which I didn’t understand. I ate the cookies, I drank the Kool-aid, too! But I didn’t go to church, so they thought I was a dirty pagan. It wouldn’t be until I was fourteen, reading the Gospels in my bedroom that I finally had my Thomas experience. From doubt to faith.

What was it for you? Maybe you grew up in church and didn’t really have that moment. But there was a day when mom and dad’s faith became yours. Do you remember when that happened? It has to happen or else we just wander around like Christian zombies. There has to be a day when you have your own reasons for not unbelieving but believing instead. Faith has to become our own, we can only borrow someone else’s for so long.

Or, maybe someone told you about Jesus. They told you how He made a difference in their life and you believed He could make a difference in yours, too. Those are fun stories to hear. The bigger the transformation, the darker it was before the lights came on, the more powerful and glorious it is. Rock star, drug addict, porn stars who give their lives to Jesus are fun to listen to.

For most people, though, it’s not that dramatic. Sometimes hearing those epic stories makes us shy about sharing ours. “What’s there to tell? I didn’t believe and now I do. I’m thankful but no one’s going to make my story into the movie of the week.”

I understand you might feel that way but I guarantee your story is more interesting than you think. It might be more Seinfeld than Breaking Bad—it’s all where you stop telling the story.

However God brought you to faith, it was your training ground—getting you ready to pass your faith to someone else. It’s not going to be easy. Remember how no one believed the women who had seen the empty tomb and the angels? Remember how hard it was for the other disciples to believe—even when Jesus was standing right in front of them? Remember stubborn Thomas who held onto his doubt no matter what his closest friends told him? Try to remember what it took for you to believe.

We all have people in our lives that we want to see come to faith—or back to faith. We’ve prayed, we’ve had conversations, we don’t know what else to do.

Don’t give up. Keep believing. Pray for them. Pray for God to soften their heart, open the doors for conversations, love them, don’t argue with them—be faithful and trust them to God and His mercy. 

And when you’re tempted to doubt, remember the disciples. Pray for your own faith, “Lord, I believe, help my unbelief!” 

Nobody starts finished. Just like you went from screaming to crawling to walking to driving to shopping at Walmart—God is making you into the person He wants you to be. All your frustrations, all your doubts, they’re all training exercises and part of your spiritual growth and sanctification. Not your justification—these things don’t save you—Jesus did that part for you. That’s what the resurrection is all about. That’s where your faith goes, not in your ability to overcome your frustrations and doubts. Just hold on to what Jesus has done for you, what He’s promised you. 

The bottom line is this: You might not see it, believe anyway. Jesus made this promise, “Blessed are those who believe without seeing.” AMEN